I am a Welsh Terrier! My ancestry (of over 2000 years) is Welsh! Over that 2000 years we Welsh Terriers have learnt to grow our coats to suit the Welsh climate, can be warm, can be very cold but above all it can rain and rain and rain. Any human holiday maker who goes there at any time of the year will soon learn to carry a cagoule or umbrella - or both - at all times! It is the only way to survive in Wales. Okay, I have my own coat trimmed a few times a year to suit the English climate and to keep up appearances, but the essential Welshness of my coat is that it is windproof and waterproof! We dogs sorted that one out.
So what does my female servant do? She buys me a human made coat for the rain! My man servant, being a Mancunian from the city famous for its rain, reluctanltly agreed that I should wear it next time the heavens opened. Well, that was today and I was not happy! However, here are a few tips for any Welshies out there which I deployed on this morning's walk:
1. When the coat is put on, stand stock still making out you can't walk.
2. Make out you can no longer jump in the car and have to be lifted in.
3. Make out you can no longer jump out of the car and have to be lifted out.
4. Do not run for the ball so that your servant has to retrieve it.
5. Do not cock your leg fully so that you can wee on the underside of the coat.
6. Make yourself look unsteady whilst pooing.
7. Shake youself every 30 seconds to make it look like the rain's getting through the coat.
8. Roll in horse poo.
9. Roll in fox poo and make sure you get most of this on your head to demonstrate the coat's futility.
10. As you are unable to jump into the car for the return journey, you servant will have to lift your horse and
fox poo covered body into the vehicle and of course out again when you get home.
Watching my man servant grumbling and shaking his head whilst hanging up my coat, I am fully confident that this has been an effective strategy.
Hello Archie. I'm Zoey The Welsh Terrier and I share your sentiment on coats entirely. I live outside Chicago, USA and my maid assumes I will be too cold to walk without the dumb pink coat. I have tried most the methods you suggested to be rid of the thing. Unfortunately, we don't often walk where I can roll in poo. So not only does my servant walk me where there is little of interest, but she forces me to wear a pink coat which she knows I dislike! Ugh.
ReplyDeleteHi Zoey. It's great to hear from you. It looks like the problem with servants is the same the world over! You give them a little bit of freedom, just to humour them, and before you know it, they've got you dressed up like a poodle! X
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